The LONG and WINDING road...

And now it's unofficial again. Ugh.

Can I just say- I "officially" LOATHE snow?

Another delay. No birthday reunion for us afterall. There is still hope for a Valentine's reunion (not that Valentine's itself means anything to us, really, just referencing what day he could arrive- if the weather on the East coast cooperates).

What a crappy roller coaster. If I have to tell my kids ONE more time that Daddy is not coming after telling them that he is, I swear my heart is going to break in two. Layla can actually go to her Valentine's party at school on Friday now, but guess what... Layla doesn't want to go to her Valentine's party on Friday. Because *I* told her that her Daddy would be home and she would be missing it. She doesn't really understand why *I* would say that if it wasn't true- AGAIN. Why do *I* keep telling her he's coming and then changing *my* mind. She's five. She kind-of-sort-of-not-really-understands that we have NO control over this. But then why don't *I* just not tell her until he's really coming?! Well.... we thought he was.

*I* don't know what to do here (knowing I can't do ANYTHING).
*I* don't know how to pass the time anymore so that the days don't draaag by while we wait.
*I* am just as upset as the kids are, honestly.

Friday was going to be SO perfect. Not just bc it's my birthday, but the kids and I had a whole plan worked out. We, once again, timed everything for the house to be nice and clean for his arrival. We were going to spend the whole morning together, have plenty of time to get ready, have one last "Mommy and Me" lunch together before going to pick him up. Have the afternoon with him/family. Have pizza that night, just like he wanted. He would be home to start the new "Pillow Talk" marriage series at church on Sunday together...

And I KNOW in my head, that it's just not the end of the world. As long as he gets home and gets home safely, that's all that matters. We just got our hopes up that this was all going to FINALLY work out and work out so well, and it seemed like such a God thing! Now... we're back to the yucky, crummy, sad, frustrating, UNKNOWN (my enemy!!).

uuuuuugggggghhhh.

"For they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount up with wings as eagles. They shall run, and not be weary; they shall walk, and not faint." - Isaiah 40:31

Lather. Rinse. Repeat.