I feel like Katy Perry would be so proud of me.

This is two (three?) days in the making, but you know... life and all.

Roman started school!
Sorta. Barely.

So cute and no idea what he's doing. I had asked if we could do half days but they weren't quite sold on the idea.

I left him at school at 8:30a on Tuesday and they called an hour later to schedule pick up at 11a. Day one was.. a lot. Our bright, curious boy just needed to check out ALL the things. Obviously, the teacher can't spend all of her time redirecting him and he sure as heck can't understand a word she's saying.  He doesn't know the rules, he doesn't even know that there are rules.

But he came out smiling and asked if he could go back again!


Afterwards, I took the two half day-ers to the park to play. These babies sure love to swing!

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This was in Brynn's folder:

And I found out this morning that Cale had gone in his class to check on him. Little love monsters.

We are definitely seeing a lot of attention seeking behaviors from all five, and negative attention is better than no attention, but we are definitely definitely seeing a whole lot of love and acceptance too. Things will settle some day!

The plan for Day 2 was 10:00a pickup. Dropped him off and then took Anna Gray. That meant I had one hour. I was going to use it to get in a run and get a quick shower- but Vanderbilt called, then the Board of Education called... so I spent the last 20 mins eating peanut butter and watching Taylor Swift videos. I was going to run to the school to pick him up, but they kept trying to call and I was having trouble answering, so I just ran back home and drove up there. They wanted him to stay another hour! They also requested a meeting for the afternoon.

He was happy again when I picked him up (but starving because you can't eat 72 times at school). We needed to re-stock snacks too so we stopped at Subway, where he chose a bacon and spinach sandwich with bbq sauce.

 I think they've bonded!

I had back to back meetings this  yesterday afternoon at the school. First an IEP meeting for Cale and then a meeting with Roman's teacher and principal.

 From now on, on the gabillions of paperwork I do regularly, when it asks my occupation... I'm going to write ADVOCATE. They don't need to know that I don't get paid for it and it's usually on behalf of my own children. THAT IS MY JOB.  

It wasn't bad. I only cried twice (because I'm proud of my kids and know they are worth every bit of effort required). Again, things just look differently from our view. We know how much our kids have already conquered. And while we will absolutely continue to work- sometimes we have bigger fish to fry. They're seven. They have time. I think by the end of both meetings, they started to get that. I'm really happy with the plans in place for both boys and I feel like- for the first time- we are all on the same page. SIDE NOTE: Guess who's getting an ESL teacher! And only staying half days for a while. ahem.

We are not afraid of hard.

I knew when I admitted we were struggling the other day, I would get mixed feedback. It never fails that the "You asked for this." comments come trickling in... anonymously from behind a computer screen, where it's safe.

We didn't choose hard. We chose LIFE. Not necessarily saving it... LIVING it. Their's. Our's.
Yes, it is hard right now. I mean, like... everything.

I cried over a banana last night. Because it was a busy/tough day, big decisions had to be made, (several) fits were thrown, we didn't have something we needed for dinner, then by the time we got it- our grill broke, and I just needed something to be easy. Dang you, banana.

Oh, but the one who had done the hurting earlier came and wrapped their sweet little arms around me and said Let me help. And one moved to the other side of the table, scooted their seat right up to mine, and held my hand through dinner. And one cried and cried until Mama sang. By the third round of the same song, that one was singing along and after the fourth round, sighed Thank you. Two made a Mama sandwich at bedtime. And then the tall handsome that I do life with, who was verbally echoing my feelings, he collapsed right next me and said WE GOT THIS.


Roar.