I STILL have paint between my toes.

It's been there for exactly one week.

Honestly, although I know it will, I wish it would never wash away. That paint between my toes is a PERFECT reminder.

It reminds me of the freshly painted churches we worked so hard on: the blue and white fence row at Grace, the brightened ceiling (with Jody's name hidden underneath!) at Deliverance, the ENTIRE inside, outside, trim and details at Hope. It reminds me of what can happen to a group of people when they work together to genuinely serve others and what happens when they don't.

The paint between my toes reminds me of "my" children at Calvary who tried to pick it off for me. They are mine. They are my family, my Jamaican family. I truly love them, and will hold them in my heart until I can get back to them.

The paint reminds me of my sweet Jada. It reminds me to pray for her and her beautiful voice. I pray that she sees in herself the gift God has given her. I pray that she believes in herself enough to follow her dream. I pray that she does well on Friday's exam. I pray that she gets something, anything, for her 14th birthday on September 8th.

The paint between my toes reminds me that we didn't have enough paint thinner (or paint 'tinner in Jamaica!) to get it off my hands AND my feet, because we had stretched their paint, and their money, as far as it could go. It reminds me of a world not so far away where people put on their Sunday best and stand out in the heat waiting as long as needed for the PRIVILEGE of going to church. It reminds of a church (churches) where people worship freely and openly and wildly, with no fear of judgement, but with HOLY JOY. A world where they eat whatever is available, play with whatever is available, wear whatever is available. The paint reminds me how SILLY America is. While we are SO blessed to have the opportunities that we do, we are also lazy and spoiled and ungrateful.

The paint between my toes reminds me of the HUNDREDS of kids at Vacation Bible School, who knew their Bible better than I did. I thought I was going there to teach them (ha!), but I was the one who learned something. I learned how to play "Brown Girl in the Ring"! I learned to try new foods, like curry goat and ackee swordfish, when someone gives all they have to provide ME with lunch. I learned about the heart of Jamaica, the heart of the Jamaican people. I learned to yell sing at the top of my lungs when you are teaching 125 Jamaican children a new song- because THEY.WILL.SING.IT....LOUDLY, excitedly with you, every time. I learned that God WILL answer you, if you will listen. I learned that is oh, so important to share what the Holy Spirit gives you. I learned that lives can be changed, in one moment- and it may not be the life you were planning on changing.

I left part of myself in Jamaica, but I brought something back too. I brought the paint on my toes.

"Once our eyes are opened, we can't pretend we don't know what to do. God, who weighs our hearts and keeps our souls, knows what we know and holds us responsible to act." Proverbs 24:12