Paging Dr. Gray...

For the first year she was home, Anna Gray watched Signing Time and only Signing Time. Nothing else held her attention or interest. Then it was two years of Sesame Street. At age four, she made a hardcore switch to Doc McStuffins.

She’s sprinkled in a variety of options here and there lately but Doc is still her #1 gal. We’ve seen so.much.Doc. So many McStuffins. For a while, Anna Gray wore her stethoscope everywhere she went. Grocery, church, bath time, bedtime...

Recently, we were at an appointment for a sibling and AG tagged along. She brought her med bag and gave the endocrinologist a full check up- named every tool & used them correctly. She instructed the doctor to “take deep breaths” as she listened with her stethoscope. She promised “no hurts” from the otoscope, and pronounced her patient all better.

The specialist asked AG (she didn’t ask me... she spoke directly to the, albeit small, fully functioning human beside me) and asked if she wanted to be a doctor someday. After a “yes ma’am”, she looked at Anna Gray and said, “YOU CAN.”

It was so strikingly different from another experience we had. During an IEP meeting for her, a person (who, please note, does *not* work at her school) dismissed all of her reported strengths and said, “Well, she has Down syndrome so obviously she’ll just be in (CDC/Special Ed) all day.” When I argued that it wasn’t Anna Gray’s LRE (least restrictive environment- which she is legally entitled to) and explained the benefits of peer models and inclusive classrooms being best for ALL students, she remarked that AG “can’t even carry her own lunch tray”. She had never even met Anna Gray. Ever.

Despite the fact that there were a slew of Anna Gray experts in the room speaking to her ABILITIES, this person made big giant assumptions based on NOTHING but her diagnosis.

Can you imagine the way each of those experiences felt? Whether you happen to have an extra chromosome or not, can you imagine being told you CAN’T by a person who doesn’t know you? What that would do to a child, to a brain, to a heart?

Now imagine being told you CAN.
What that would do to a child, a brain, a heart!

****Hot tip: ASSUME COMPETENCE.

Whether a person has Down syndrome, is on the autism spectrum, or is typically developing... assume they CAN. Then, if they need support/extra time/whatever to do it, help them get there.

AND WHILE WE’RE HERE (bc who knows if I’ll manage to get another post out this month 😬😬), let’s re-visit the “R” Word...

Twenty something years ago, it was unfortunately common slang. Not anymore. At this point, “retard” is lazy & HURTFUL. Scientifically, our girls are considered mentally retarded. Did you mean stupid when you said it? Because this kid speaks parts of four languages. Did you mean ugly when you made that face and called it ‘retarded’? Because she also has a modeling contract 🤔 And you better bet she can carry that dang lunch tray.
Honestly, I’m done being nice about that.
Get yourself a thesaurus and break the habit- you CAN! 😉
— When you know better, do better. —

Thank you & be kind is all.
And listen ... if you don’t know our Annie Sunshine, the only assumption you should make is that YOU ARE MISSING OUT.

“Anna Gray, you are incredible.”