The cutest football game ever.

Our boys are obsessed with football.

Cale reallyreallyreally wanted to play this year.  We decided that wasn't the best choice just yet, for various reasons. We agreed to compromise with flag football, so he could learn the fundamentals, make sure he liked it, etc, but as it turned out- we were going to miss half of the six week season bringing Roman home. Sorry, bud.

Roman yells "Go Vols!" no matter what game he's watching. He talks about football non-stop and always asks if he can play when he's 8? 12? 30?

I bought them a cheapo ball and every day they go out and play catch and tackle each other on the trampoline like boys do.

So this week, with emotions at home being a little more "regular" and all, we inched out one by one to join the game. Finally, we had everyone but Layla involved. She likes books. Not football. But she read her book in the sunshine nearby and occasionally threw out a "Good job, Buddy!". She's the cheerleader, I guess. She just likes books. Not football.

1) It's tricky to actually play and man the camera at the same time. I'm gonna need a GoPro if these games continue.
2) I have the best arm on the field. (Nathan and I spent several college weekends on campus with him teaching me how to throw a spiral and then "coaching" my co-ed flag football team, even though he didn't even attend our school.) Cale's is looking pretty darn good for a 7yr old though.
3) There's nothing sweeter than two boys who waited their whole lives to play football with their brother, ACTUALLY playing football with their brother. Cale's dimples are on full display and Roman with that hysterical cackle. (Cackle, not tackle, because the boy doesn't have a chance of catching his "big" brother.)
4) The touchdown dances... Amazing. Nathan says it's like Deion Sanders on Broadway.
5) Anna Gray thinks she's one of the big boys, which tips the cuteness over the top instantly. And then Walker {pup} thinks he's one of 'em too.

{You can see Walker's chest and legs in between Brynn & Nathan.}

I also have video of Roman with the ball trying to decide who to throw it to. He spins around looking at all his options dramatically, with at least two voices begging for it and the other two repeating what his choices are. While turning in circles, he repeats each person's name (Daddy? Brynn? Cale? Annie?) then says, "I don't know! Maybe!" He looks right at the camera and mouths "Mommy" before I give him the okay and attempt to catch his wild little toss without stopping the video. Adorbs.

All was going well until Cale forgot not to tackle and tackled (boys will be boys...). While we were assisting Brynn off the field, Roman hiked the ball right into Anna Gray's face. hard. When she saw me put my hand over my mouth, waiting for her reaction, she said, "It's not funny.", then took the ball and waddled off.
Game over?

Still, while it lasted, it was THE CUTEST FOOTBALL GAME EVER.

This month's debris, so far.

All I have wanted is a day to stay home and clean and today I finally got one. So, obviously, I made myself a "healthy" salted caramel mocha, googled pictures of Scott Foley (for research purposes) and made a list of reasons why we should move to NYC instead.  If we can make it there, we can make it anywhere. I did manage to get a red bow in AG's hair for Red Day, so I feel like I've really got it together. Who cares if her hair was spit-shined and I didn't put a jacket on her? I remembered the red bow.  I am mothering like a boss.

I am so, so grateful for my children.
I am so, so grateful for hot, running water.
But in a perfect world, it would be impossible for the two to exist at the same time.

They came in twelve times during my ten minute shower. TWELVE. I couldn't Broadway-belt a single song without interruption. Precious souls.
And then I mopped up pickle juice and glass.

I'll take that kind of stress any day, though. Broken washing machines, owning rental property (DON'T DO IT.), and insurance are for the birds. And there just aren't enough hours in the day. Except in New York, which basically runs 24/7 like me. It is, afterall, the concrete jungle where dreams are made of.

Also, here's some truth-telling for you: We haven't slept in our bed since MARCH. Our cheap inexpensive mattress is now 12 years old and it turns out, we are not 21 anymore and require -gasp- lumbar support. Don't get me wrong, we sleep on (what used to be) a super comfy sectional couch and we are adorable and hold hands and face each other and All That Jazz (ba dum ching). {I promise that's the last one.}

We are at the post-adoption point where we are still so haggard we can hardly see straight, but we can at least recognize that things are way better than they were a month ago and we're relatively lively because of it.

PLUS! One sweet boy is starting to participate in life and show back up in our pictures again :) :) :) :)

We were SUPER proud of his (and both girls!!) report cards showing how hard he has been working. Cale is the bravest, strongest boy I know.

Roman didn't have a report card, but is now staying almost the whole day at school. We are just about ready to make the leap, but a little unsure of how he will handle related arts classes (different classroom/teacher everyday....). Don't want to overwhelm him too much. His teacher and I have an open line of communication, but I get the real scoop from his peers. First graders will tell you everything.  He has a LOT of medical stuff coming up and he's undecided on whether or not he should be mad at us about that. He tells us he loves us about 72,000 times a day so I think we're good.

 I probably wouldn't advise taking your newly-adopted Chinese son to a funeral, where he has no idea what's going on AND a bunch of people want to meet him. But ya gotta do what ya gotta do and he handled it pretty darn well, considering. He only asked one stranger-to-him to hold him.  I think we can consider the boy fairly attached if I am running all over the house with him literally hanging onto my pants. I mean he has been sitting in my lap with his lips actually attached to my face. Which is excellent, of course ... and also, Please let me accomplish things just for a second you magnificent, sweet sweet child. I love you. I will definitely for sure miss it some day, but let's get real... them dishes ain't gonna wash themselves and peoples got to eat.

More recent firsts:

Movie theater

Sweet Cece's 

Punkin pickin'

And this Saturday, he'll attend his first Buddy Walk to support his baby sister (not sure how to translate that one?!).

I am so excited because it's the first year that Annie can actually WALK at the Buddy Walk!  Her other current talents include: Shaking it off, feeding herself, and stomping her feet adorably fast when she's excited. She has also gotten rather independent and says, "I big!" when she wants to do it herself.  Pistol Annie would love for you to join us to raise awareness for Down Syndrome on this gorgeous upcoming weekend!

You can register to walk with our team HERE, (but you don't have to).
Just show up, wear your sunshine yellow (speaking of... our house is now short one shirt, if anyone can't make it and has one we can borrow until Roman gets his own? Any size, we'll make it work.)!  It's free to walk with us, and there are lots of activities and food trucks, etc. Fun day! Come :)



I took an online quiz called "Can we guess your occupation?" that guessed I was an Executive Chef.
You are exactly right, Buzzfeed, I totally am.
Since this, weirdly, has come up in conversation a few times recently, as well as animal proteins, and our requested weekly menu- I will probably share it here completely irregularly with links, for ease.
Behold, this week:

Saturday: Stuffed pizza mushrooms and kale salad.
Sunday: Apple & Cheddar soup.
Monday: Crustless spinach, mushroom, and feta quiche.
Tuesday: Sax Deli for Spirit Night
Wednesday: Kale and Sweet Potato Nachos, side of salsa chicken for the carnivores.
Thursday: Cheese ravioli with roasted veggies.
Friday: Crunchy black bean tacos.

Happy Octobering!

Fall "break". Enter hysterical laughing at the thought of it.

So, it's been a minute. Life has been... {fill in the blank.}

Several months back, a whole bunch of adoptive mommas shared a blog about the realities of the first year home. I would pinky swore I saved it, but I can't find it anywhere now. Wish I could, so I could reference it and see that we still fall somewhere in the "normal" bracket.

Roman had his second transfusion and it went much more smoothly. We did his type/screen blood draw the day before, so no super long wait for a blood match. When I told him it was transfusion day, he said: One, xin xue (new blood) and two, home with Mama! sqeeeee. So, he got it- and wasn't afraid of being abandoned this time. Before fall break, he had worked his way to staying through lunch at school. He was doing pretty well! I go up there to help him transition and sit with him to help him understand/follow the rules. Which means I am at one of the schools five times a day, every day, between 8:30-12:30 , but stop #3 (lunch) is my favorite. His lunch time is overlapped by the twins' lunch time, so I get to see three at once. Not sure what to expect when he goes back after a nine days off...

I know I say it every single post, but his English is really coming along well. So impressive.

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Layla had her tonsils and adenoids out Monday.
She's my Nervous Nellie, but she handled it really well. They wheeled her off to the OR with Eric Clapton blasting from a cell phone. Afterward, two nurses and her doctor all came to tell me she was the coolest. kid. ever. AGREED.

She's been a star patient and recovery has been better than expected so far. knockonallthewood.

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Anna Gray decided -literally- over night that she was not a baby anymore. She was upgraded from a crib to a twin bed and her changing table was removed and replaced by big kid stuff. She's delighted. She kept saying, "Annie's bed! I so big!". Up down, up down, jump jump jump.

Then *I* became the Nervous Nellie. The side rail was up, new baby gate, entire room extra toddler-proofed, but I still checked on her approximately one million times the first night.

Here's my cautionary tale that I'd rather not talk about, but just in case someone else doesn't cross this T:
Nathan asked me if we should put the second rail up on the bedside against the wall. Nah, There's only a couple inches of space. Then we couldn't find Elmo. He was in the crack. So, we should probably put the other rail up then. BUT WE DIDN'T. On night two, Brynn came to say she couldn't sleep because Annie was crying. Guys... she was stuck. In those "couple inches" between the bed and wall. Terrifyingly stuck. Someone had turned off the monitor and we didn't hear her. That baby, my baby, could have died and that's the truth. I still sort of can't breath over it and won't even mention the amount of guilt and panic and gratitude, but just PUT THE DAMN RAIL ON.

Other than the near death experience, she really does love her room. She goes in there to play with her toys and sits in a chair to read a book. She goes to sleep beautifully and is just very very big.

Moving forward.

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Our house is in a state of disarray that drives me insane. We are not finishers. Time, money, exhaustion yada yada has left many partial projects, setting stuff aside to deal with later and then collapsing of exhaustion before completion.  I keep our living areas clean, but some extra rooms have become big ole' stacks of anxiety. So, I needed to simplify for sanity and started cleaning out. That's what led to Anna Gray's room makeover. Then I had this idea that it was a good time to just finish those unfinished projects and basically re-do everything that I wasn't happy with. Since it's fall "break" and all. We just celebrated two years in this house last week, and then I drug everything out and it now looks like we just moved in. Nathan loves when I get big ideas.

It's a bit a like a bruise. It had to get worse before it could get better. Ironically, I think I need to get the kids back in school in order to finish. Those before and afters I used to do (and also never finished), I'm determined to finish them. They will now be BEFORE, HALF-ASSED FINISHED (pardon my American), and finally, AFTER. Determined. To (eventually) finish.

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Aside from surgeries and transfusions and appointments and the like, I do love having my little humans home. This week has had a much lighter tone than the previous month. I think 6 out of 7 are pretty well adjusted and I think Number 7 is on his way.  It was not pretty there for a while. Not just not pretty... ugly. Lots of people have 5+ children, lots of people can relate to chaos of just being a busy, active, full household, etc. I don't mean to offend (I really don't... and I'm not discounting the difficulties anyone else faces), but sometimes I want to say: IT'S NOT THE SAME.

There's a fine line between being honest and transparent and protecting the hearts of my children. Publicly, I will just say that attachment disorders, Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD), Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD) and all the other letters on his chart are a dangerous combination, especially when his whole world has just been turned upside down by an adoption AND going back to school. Parenting a child with that combination is HARD in ways that you can only understand if you've done it/are doing it (especially if said child is as strong as you are....).

I would never ever want you to think that he is "bad", because he is not. He is good- so, so good. He just has some very big feelings that he doesn't know what to do with. The bat signal has been activated, the "team" is engaged, and I pray/hope/believe we are on our way back to safe place. This break from school could be exactly what he needs to catch his breath and reset, or it could start all over again when he goes back.  For the love of Pete, PRAY, hug a mama or daddy parenting an "ETL" (Easy to love, Hard to raise), take a deep breath and be grateful for your child.

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We have strong, healthy, beautiful children and having them home this week meant: artwork, puppy birthday parties, jumping in leaves, snuggling on the couch, lots and lots of reading, creative play, riding bikes, talent shows, big questions and tricky answers, pineapple-kale smoothies (our fav), laundry relay races, too many games of "catch the runaway dog" in the rain, sleepless nights, and a host of other tidbits that I could just soak up every day every day every day.

(AG is squatting like them....adorbs.)

Life has been... {fill in the blank}, but I wouldn't change (hardly any) of it.