FEARLESS!

At church we are discussing a series called FEARLESS. I had the opportunity to overcome one of my fears last week and wanted to share that with you, as I did our congregation on Sunday.

Background:
When I was 16, I had driven to Nashville to meet with my pageant coaches. When I left, I stopped to get gas nearby. When I came out of the gas station (this was before "pay at the pump"), a homeless man was standing on the other side of my car. He pulled a knife and demanded the money he had seen me get back from the cashier. He told me to get in the car and follow his directions. I got on the interstate, as he told me too, and drove several miles down the road. Just as I was about to throw myself out of my vehicle (I had seen on Oprah that you were supposed to do that), he told me to take the next exit. I got off the exit and drove down behind these (seemingly) empty warehouse buildings. He then jumped out of my car and took off running.

I told no one.

I think I was afraid my parents would stop letting me drive or take my car away.
Because of this experience, I have struggled with some PTSD- I am terrified of people who are homeless, particularly men (I know that sounds terrible), I hate gas stations, I avoid pumping my own gas at all costs (leave it for my husband to do or when he is with me).


Fast-forward.
Last Tuesday, my purse was stolen out of my car at our home. A checkbook, my debit card, a credit card, pictures of my kids, various resturant/discount cards were all gone. We managed to realize it and close our bank account and credit card account before any monetary damage was done. Not a big deal, just a bit of an inconvenience.

On Wednesday, I had to go downtown for a costume fitting. It was mid-afternoon and I was hungry! Of course, I had no debit or credit card. We NEVER have cash, but I managed to dig around and find $2 in my console. Just as I did, I stopped at a red light. A homeless man approached my window. I took a deep breath and remembered our FEARLESS series.

"For God gave us not a spirit of fearfullness, but of power and love and discipline."
2 Timothy 1:7

I know this.
I rolled down my window and gave him my $2 just as the light turned green. I drove up a block to my destination, only to discover they had moved. I turned around to go back the other direction and was stopped again at the same light. I looked around, but the man was nowhere to be found. Just then, my phone rang. A 16-yr-old girl called to tell me she found all of my stuff (minus the checkbook, debit, and credit card) in the floor at a Kroger in Inglewood (about an hour away from my house). She offered to bring it to me, but we ended up meeting in the middle that night. I got back EVERYTHING else that had been in my wallet. The pictures of my kids, my zoo card, my Sweet Cece's frequent buyer card (woot woot!), insurance cards... EVERYTHING. My new credit and debit cards have already arrived.



Thank you, Jesus for giving me a spirit of power and love and discipline. I don't have to be afraid.