The long & winding road HOME!

Well... we made it!

The details are a little fuzzy.

We checked out of our hotel in GZ Thursday afternoon and had to wait it out in the lobby for an and a half. Not my favorite hour and a half. By the time our guide walked in, he was kicking and screaming for help, banging his head on the floor while I held him by the waist. I can't even remember why. The security guard was keeping an uncomfortably close eye on us. I'm not sure how these behaviors are usually handled in China, but our guide, Cordelia, walked in and said, "Oh, I'm getting a picture!" Then looked at him and said COOL IT. ha. Thanks, new friend. 

We took a van from Guangzhou, China to Hong Kong (3 hour-ish drive) Thursday evening. We stayed at the hotel attached to the airport again with a the perfect view of planes coming and going, and headed out for America the next day!

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 I had a hard time explaining to the boys how we left Hong Kong at 1:30PM Friday and flew 15 hours to arrive in Dallas at 4:30PM... Friday. 

They both did GREAT on the long flight. 

Roman was definitely bored in the beginning, but not super wiggly- thank goodness! He started and fast forwarded Spiderman at least 24 times. Whatever keeps you busy, dude. Eventually, he crawled into my lap and fell fast asleep for a good 7 hours! Which was a long 7 hours for me really, but that's totally okay. I slid him into his seat and his head into my lap. Cale fell asleep for just a bit on my shoulder. I'm not gonna lie- it was my favorite moment of the whole trip. Both my boys sleeping on me contently.  Both so excited to be going HOME. Both dripping onto their MAMA in our last moments together. Both with eyes aching to reach their daddy and sisters.

Only one quick flight to go.

Our five hour layover in Dallas was spent mostly in Customs&Immigration while Roman said "hamburger!" 72 times. We found one as soon as we could and he promptly removed the hamburger and devoured his juicy bun. We boarded for Nashville at 8:00PM/central and landed at 10:05PM... LONG DAY. Plum worn out. 

Even after all that, he handled all the screaming white people really well!

He spotted Daddy right away and was only hesitant for a quick minute!

 He slowly started making his way around naming everyone he could and repeating the names of everyone else. Within about five minutes (literal five minutes), he was following Jie Jie Brynn and picking up Mei Mei Annie.  What a little overcomer.

We had such a warm welcome at the airport because we have THE BEST family and friends in the history of ever. 

Finally headed HOME!

Of course, there was a quite a bit of discussion over who got to sit next to him on the ride home. 

His little face when we walked in the door for the first time and he saw his room... Oh warmth in my heart. I tried to get ahead him with the camera, but he was too quick. He was delighted. Despite the time on the clock, he needed to give everything a quick once over and specifically asked to meet the dog. 

Everyone crashed quickly and I managed to sleep until about 4AM and Roman slept until 9!

It was a bit like Christmas when all the littles were finally up and ready to study each other!  I'm not gonna lie, Day One set us off on a damn good start.

He was happy to eat oatmeal for breakfast (#wipesbrow) and Nathan just had to get him some fried noodles for lunch. It was sort of funny for me to let them figure things out for themselves and get to know each other on their own terms. Roman wanted his daddy to hold him a lot, which just thrilled Nathan.

HIGHLIGHTS:

He acted like I was crazy telling him that he could use the water from the faucet to brush his teeth. Even the locals don't use the water in China without boiling it first. 

Equally intrigued/pleased by ice in his water. Ice is a treasure when you have to boil the water before you freeze it. I know he's seen it because I had it once or twice, but I'm not sure he's ever had it in his own glass. He was fascinated!

He also didn't understand that this is America. And this is his house. When I finally used Google translate to tell him, he ran around pointing at every room yelling "Roman's!!".

I got to take the girls out to lunch yesterday and spend a little time catching up on the last two weeks. Happy Mama.  Missed those sweet little souls so stinking much.

Brynn and Roman have definitely hit it off! They played all.day.long. Two busy little bees!

Pretty sure they have already developed their own language. Not surprised even a little.

As much as Cale adores his little brother, it's hard to be with anyone 24 hours a day for that long. We did e v e r y t h i n g together for two straight weeks with really nowhere to turn. He handled it like a champ, but he was happy to have some space and down time!

Roman is infatuated with his Mei Mei Annie. I'm not sure he's really ever spent time with someone smaller than him. He was the (spoiled!) "baby" in his foster home, but he just loves taking care of her- as much as she'll let him! He wants to get her milk and cover her up and carry her around. Since he doesn't outweigh her by much, it's rather comical. 

Layla is definitely the most disconnected(?) at this point. I think it's completely normal given 1) It's been 24 hours since they met; and 2) Their's is the greatest age difference. She is a very mature ten year old and he's a very small, immature seven year old (acts closer to five, really). And she can not get over how small he is compared to the other two!  They'll find their niche in time!

We tossed him right into the American Food Den last night with a nacho bar. He did awesome! He didn't love it, but he did try everything and let us know what he liked and didn't like. I offered a 'lil miso soup on the side and he was so sweetly grateful. Also, Brynn blessed our food and offered up genuine praise for Roman's chance to know Him. VERKLEMPT. We had talked about it before, but I honestly hadn't thought about it lately. And ya'll- straight talk, I didn't even pray with him in China. I prayed for him and over him and about him and prayers all over the place... but I didn't pray with him. The survival mode and all. But last night- nachos and prayers and it was good.

Today- Day Two- the boys and I have been up since 2AM. Jet lag is a B word and pizza delivery will be my saving grace.  :::FOOTBALL TIME IN TENNESSEE! He already knows Rocky Top. Not kidding.::  Maybe it's not gonna be fun later, but... I have secretly enjoyed our time this morning. It was like our own secret little club of people who get it.

Cale worked on schoolwork without much argument and I set Roman up with a learning game on the computer to practice some basics in English. HE LOVED IT. 

He beamed when I told him he is so smart. I asked if he wanted to go to school and I might as well have offered up Disney World. He was ecstatic at the thought, loud-whispering "Roman is going to school! Roman is going to school!"  Outward affection is still relatively new for him, but unrelented hugs and kisses followed anyway.

With Google translate and a whole lot of expressive gestures- he was asking

Can I take my backpack?!

Can I have books?! Paper?!

How many days until I go to school?!

Layla, Brynn, Cale and ROMAN go to school?!

Watch out, WFE... you are getting a firecracker. 

Gentle reminder, we will be hunkering down for quite some time. I am so proud of this little boy, but this is all so very new. He is doing great, but he doesn't really get that this is it. We are his and he isn't going anywhere else. We don't want to confuse him by gallivanting all over town and letting all you precious people smooch on him just yet! Soon, soon.

So.. we did it. And Day One is in the books. 

 Don't get me wrong: The journey was hard. It is hard. It will likely get harder before it gets easier, but it is so worth it. 

This time, adopting an older child, was completely different. Not unlike the other adventures, I was smacked in the face by the gained perspective. Smacked me real good. 

I'm about to cliche' your pants off.

This is the "Sermon on the Blog".

Don't sweat the small stuff. 

AND IT'S ALL SMALL STUFF. 

Really. All of it.

I don't know if people still say, Oh, I don't care about XYZ, I just want my child to be healthy.

Because truth is, this is America and that's a load of crap. People care. They want their kid to be healthy... and smart and athletic and well-liked and all those wonderful things. And they are wonderful and absolutely normal wishes to have for your children. 

But in today's world, it feels like expectations are growing all the time.  I know we are not alone, but we just want our kids to be healthy. Physically, emotionally, spiritually. JUST healthy. Anything else is gravy. Small stuff. Peanuts, folks.  I promise the world is so much bigger. Go see it.  Let it change you. Learn from it. I document our escapades here as a 21st century photo album for my kids and because occasionally, I need to go back and learn the same lessons over and over. 

I've only known the kid for for 12 days, but already, life with Roman West has taught me so much. 

The Wests are finally and officially complete (barring some sort of Mother Mary miracle) and ready to let these five little humans (continue to) teach us about life. Thank you for letting me ramble on about our adventures and cheering us through it- FOR REAL.  We have the best village!!

Welcome home, Roman Jude Zheng!

** JUST A SNEAK PEEK OF IMAGES BY RACHEL NORRIS PHOTOGRAPHY- MORE TO COME!**

LAST FULL DAY IN CHINA!!

We decided to adjust our attitudes and enjoy it.

In 24 hours, we will be on our way to Hong Kong! WHOOP.

We were sworn in at the Consulate this morning and officially applied for Roman's visa to enter the States! Our guide will pick it up tomorrow afternoon and we will immediately head out.

Kinda overwhelming actually.

No secret that I'm ready to be home, but so so sad for him to leave his. He clearly has mixed emotions as well. He keeps showing me pictures of his foster family and asking me to fly them to America with us. Then he asks when we will fly him back to China.  I know he was told he will have to wash all his own clothes and take care of himself completely and that we will hurt him if he is naughty. Ugh. He keeps asking me if that's true. He's afraid he's going to lose his Mandarin. (Local China moms- suggestions on how to keep that from happening?!).

But then he looks at pictures of the girls and gets SO excited. He is especially excited about "Mei Mei Annie". (Mei Mei = little sister) He tells everyone that his Mei Mei Annie is a fairy, haha... he means fair. He's asked how old she is, how much does she weigh? How old is Brynn? How old is Layla? How old is Daddy (Oh, my daddy is so young and handsome!)  He asks if Daddy and sisters will be there when we get off the plane. Will there be a swimming pool in America and can he take his backpack to school?!


At the pool today, he told anyone that would listen, "ZhengNing goes to America in two days!!".

Right after I took this, he turned around and said, "I love you, Cale" -- in English.

Just in case it wasn't clear... I COULD NOT HAVE DONE THIS WITHOUT THIS AMAZING BOY. Not a chance.

He has changed.
Without a doubt, he has changed.
I don't know if he will pass his makeup tests next week, but he has learned so much.
On the outside:  Cale has learned lots about the Chinese culture, speaking Mandarin phrases, reading/recognizing Chinese characters. He has learned about different foods and technology and geography. He has learned to navigate in a foreign country and communicate without language.

On the inside? Holy moly. He's learned the importance of unconditional love. He's learned he's grateful for his mama (his words!). He's happier. He's more positive. He's more mature. He's more accepting. He's proud of his family. He's helpful. He's more outgoing.

The bond the boys have had the chance to create as brothers- and the time for Cale and I together- I wouldn't trade it for anything.

I can't even describe it. And I hope it sticks. If this were a broadway musical (because in my mind, everything is...) this would be the perfect time for a pivotal song.


Speaking of change, tonight at dinner, Roman really attempted to chew with his mouth closed. He said "excuse me" when his body made loud noises, and when he started to run with his plate, his whispered "An tin (calm down). Good boy." haha. Progress! I don't know how he will do when he wakes up and there is not an entire buffet of food to choose from. Actually, wondering how I will handle that as well. I've really grown accustomed to my fancy morning salad! And my lounge AKA appetizer heaven. Apps are my fav.

The next couple of days will be a little tricky to navigate, considering how low I'm running on brain power. Mucho prayers appreciated. I changed our travel arrangements to make getting to HK easier on myself. We went to the store and got something we can eat for dinner and breakfast in our hotel room.  I only get a few minutes of wifi there, so the next time you hear from us will be from the States!!

Tour de Guangzhou

After breakfast, we met our local guide to go over the paperwork needed for tomorrow's consulate appointment, and then we headed out to "tour the city"!

Speaking of breakfast.... this week RJZ has discovered a love for ketchup. He's still not big on trying American food, but he will eat ketchup on anything- including most of his Chinese food.

Before this adoption, I honestly had no idea that China was the pearl capital. I asked to go to the pearl market - where you can get top quality pearls much less expensive than the States.

The ENTIRE mall is pearl stores. 

It was pretty neat. We looked at several varieties of sizes, colors, shapes but left without buying any strands. Roman wants STUFF.  He doesn't care what it is, he wants it, and when I say no... I usually get a pouty face. If it's not something he actually cares about, he uses the face for his own amusement mostly and then goes on giggling. If it's something he did want, he may show it a few times until he's distracted by something else.

So, at the pearl market- Roman asked for a lovely $200 strand of pearls. I said no.
He cried FOR AN HOUR. Lol.

Like... alligator tears, slobbering, dragging his feet- for a solid sixty minutes. While our guide told us all about the city and we walked through herb markets and animal markets, he sobbed. I think he may have been a little tired! (Totally normal for him to tire easily due to the Thalassemia... not really sure where the pearls come in.)

Cale briefly had a similar reaction when I didn't let him use his souvenir money on a waterproof watch or new pair of Nikes. Thankfully, it didn't last long.

Back to the tour...


We walked from the pearl market to Shamian Island and we learned a lot!
This is the old city of GZ, with some of the buildings being built in the 1800s.

Cordelia explained each of the herbs and what they are used for in Chinese culture- teas, soups, ailments, etc. Interesting stuff.

Trees and bridges that have been here for several hundred years. Really beautiful.

We finally made it to the island to do some shopping and made friends with lots of store owners!
This is Helen- she just loved our little family! Such sweet words to take home with us, as well as some goodies.

At another store, Cale picked out a knife and sheath carved from ox bone as his souvenir. He was so sweet to the owner and I bought some great things to take back to our girls and Roman found a kaleidoscope he really wanted. (Whatdoyaknow, he stopped crying.) The owner gave me a jade bracelet as a thank you!

I was looking for something else, when we found a couple of handmade Chinese quilts. The lady said each silk square came from a different family, knowing that a lot of adoptive families shop here, so their children would always be wrapped in their heritage. She could have been absolutely blowing smoke for all I know, but Roman LOVED it. It seemed like just the right keepsake for him.

We also met a very kind man and watched him create his incredible pictures using only ink and his fingertips.

I see lots of adoptive families get this pic, so I thought I better get one too:

{I am so tired of recycling the same clothes over and over. You'd be surprised how many times you will wear something when you have to wash it in the bathtub and wait three days for it to dry... not a skill I'm likely to add to my resume.}

We planned to eat lunch out by the river, but Roman was just too tired. He slept in the van on the short drive back to the hotel. Cale was still hungry so we grabbed McDs- complete with green tea ice cream.

We rested in the room until time for dinner.... guess what he learned to do?!

He asked me last night to write it down for him and he's been practicing all afternoon! He can also write his numbers in English... at least until 22.

He also tried on the unders I got him today and left them on for a whole three minutes! Then he said, "Mommy, give them to Cale".

The last hour before dinner was rough.

I know you can tell that I'm weary. He's a lot, this is a lot... it's a lot for us and it's a lot for him. There are no breaks. It's all hands on deck ALL THE TIME. I know Nathan feels the same; he's not used to running home base! We are ready to have our family together. We are ready to find our new normal. And we are close- we are so close. Tomorrow is our appointment at the Consulate. His visa should be ready Thursday and then we leave for Hong Kong. That's 48 hours from now! WE ARE SO CLOSE.

Fake it til ya make it.

Finally got to Skype with Nathan and the girls this morning. I told Nathan, "I think it was just the excitement and fresh transfusion that had him so wild- he's much calmer now!"

Jokes on you, Mama.

We slept in this morning because we finally had nowhere to be. First of all, when the foster parents filled out his "schedule", I assumed they just made it up based on approximate averages as I usually do. What time does she eat lunch? Ehhhh ...noon-ish. Sure. Noon sounds good.

Apparently, this was not so. The boy watches the clock like a hawk and when it strikes 7:30, Cinderella's gots to eat! Side note, he has learned to count to six in English because that's when we eat dinner.

Second of all... FOOD IS FUEL. It doesn't matter what he eats (trust me, I'm watching the sugar... even though our guide says she doesn't think it's true that sugar makes kids hyper.... Imma trust my gut on this one.) When he eats, he is revved up and ready to go. Since we had slept in, we were a little off our routine and I forgot to do our calming oils aka liquid Xanax.

It didn't hit me until we headed out the door in search for the Carrefour (Walmart-ish store). I was trying to talk to the hotel staff downstairs about a couple of changes and he was OUT OF CONTROL. I was giving  him my best Mommy looks, too bad he had no idea what they meant. While we were outside waiting for a taxi, he broke the taxi stand and then started shouting, "My mommy did it! She broke it!". Um. No.

I think that's when he figured out what the look meant.

He was acting like he was going to go out into the road, just to test me. I took his hand and since he was trying to jerk it away, held it fairly tight. I felt bad, because I know his friends at the orphanage told him when he got to America, his parents would hurt him if he were naughty. Breaks my heart, but not enough to let him run out into the road, so I held on. He tried digging his fingernails in, then tried biting. I ignored him completely. We finally got a taxi and I thought the taxi driver was going to kick us out.

We found the Carrefour and strapped that little sucker into a shopping cart. Praise Jesus.
He was very good at the store, though.

We stocked up on snacks but unfortunately, I didn't bring a grocery bag with me. So we/I had to carry everything back out. We had been warned that it would be difficult to get a taxi for the ride back, which proved to be true. Luckily (?!) one of the motorized bike taxis finally stopped.

We'll count that as today's adventure!

I laughed so hard at Cale straddling this Chinese man while we zoomed about town. Roman and I were both riding side-saddle in the back. HEAVEN HELP US. Three of us (plus the driver) stacked on this man's little bike, me holding all of our groceries with no bag, and he was squeezing in between cars and buses and driving across intersections during red lights. It's like a roller coaster... fun as long as you don't die.

We got off at our hotel and walked strait to Starbucks. Roman was doing summersaults next to the stirrers. I deserved a venti.

I am the worst selfie taker in the short-but-still-too-long history of selfies, but I was going to attempt to send West a pic of my coffee.

Couldn't help but laugh.

He did get busy with his toy for a minute, so Cale and I attempted to catch up on schoolwork. His teacher put a LOT of work into preparing a binder for him of everything he was going to miss while he was gone. Except if he were home, he would be in school seven hours a day. And there is seven hours a day worth of work in this binder. We don't have seven hours a day. And because we "adopted a firecracker"... we don't have seven minutes a day. We are trying, we really are, but during one math sheet, Roman LITERALLY climbed the drapes and nearly flooded the bathroom.

It's no coincidence that the first English phrases he learned to say completely unprompted are: "Sorry, Cale", "Sorry, Mommy". However, he is very, very good at saying thank you. He says thank you for everything, which is really sweet.  

I spent a lot of time smiling through my teeth today because there really is no other option. Besides medicating with chocolate, that's a viable option.

He has been with us for one week today, which is a weird feeling. How can I be so in love, when we only met one week ago? But I am. How can he be so completely our's, when he hasn't even met his daddy and sisters? But he is.

We leave for Hong Kong in three days! We made arrangements to tour the city tomorrow and do some shopping. Excited to have something to fill our day. Wednesday is our appointment at the Consulate, we pick up his visa on Thursday and then we begin the long journey home!